Oh, Happy Day!

I received a package from my family yesterday. It was, seriously, one of the most exciting things that has happened to me! In it, they included some things I had forgotten when I left, some things I had asked for, and some little things to make me happy. They seriously did a great job.

One of the thing I had forgotten was flip flops. Now, those of you who know me well know that I basically can’t survive without flip flops. O.k., that is an exaggeration, but you get the point. In my glorious package was not one, but two pairs of my favorite flips. Yahoo!!!!!!

So, today, for the first time since I’ve been in the AZ, I got to wear my flip flops. I honestly think it changed my entire demeanor. Having my flip flops (shap shap in Azeri) on my feet made me feel more like me than I have in a while. I was lighter, more confident, more content, and I think I had a bit of an epiphany, all because of my flip flops.

Being new in a culture can be tough. Trying to assimilate and be accepted by the community makes you incredibly self conscious and aware. We received a lot of guidance about being culturally appropriate. On a normal day, walking down the street, I keep my head down, especially when there are men around. I don’t smile. Walking in to shops, I say a quite “salam”, tell them what I need, pay, and leave.

Today, on the magical flip flop day, I rebelled a bit from my hyper-awareness of being culturally appropriate. I held my head up as I walked down the street. I was still careful not to make eye contact with men – I don’t really want them to make inquires about how much I cost – but I did look at the women I passed. And I smiled and said “salam.” And they smiled back and said “salam” back. And tried to have more a conversation than “I need toilet paper” with the salesperson at the shop. It was all lovely!

I was proud to be me – perky Jane – and I was happy to be walking down the street in my village and I was confident that I can totally do this. I will admit, I was having a bit of a hard time for the past week or so. But what I remember today, is that I am still me, just in a different world. And AzerbaiJane is a pretty cool person to be.